Scorecard

Northwood Town v Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club 2nd XI on Sat 04 Sep 2010 at 1:00pm
Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club Won by 44 runs

Match report Here endeth the season...

T’were an early do (12.30 start), this last game, and we were running late. Once we’d fathomed out where we were supposed to be laking, we got theer and t’gaffer, Rizwan, won t'toss. He decided to bat and set about reversing t’order, geein a couple of us callow youths t’chance ter shine.

“Callow youths, get thisens out t’t’coal face,” bellowed t’gaffer. So off they trotted. And once theer, them lads fettled and toiled, putting t’old men o’team ter shame wi’ their gumption. (It’s allus arse-about-face in t’twos, tha knows.)

Northwood Town looked spent in t’field afore they'd even started. They were already relegated and ah could see why. They were dropping catches catches like Dizzy Rascal drops rhymes (?). Captain Birdseye (McDougal) dollied one up very first ball, only for their mid off ter sumow chuck it over ‘is shoulder.

Comical stuff. Unless you're their skipper. And bowling well. And you've just trapped McDougal plum in front, offering no shot, only for the umpire to inexplicably say 'Not out.' Had you been he, you would probably have said something akin to what he actually did say, which I can't repeat here in case a lady is reading.

Everybody ok so far?

Any road, all this youthful gumption (yuk) meant it were ages afore owt ‘appened. Ah went ter sleep for a bit, like, ‘avin’ been sunk to number nine, so’s I’m not sure what went on. Maybes Roger Luck can ‘elp yer out on this score – although ‘e were diddlin’ with his facephonemachine when ah dropped off, so ah doubt it, like. I do know that young fettler A – McDougal – got 40-odd. And W. G. Durrani no doubt stroked it abaht nicely agin for his 60-odd. I also know that Riz, Haris and Nice One all chipped in wi’ good runs – but only ‘cos t’scores are downstairs.

We’d just about reached our eventual total of 191-8 when finally, wi’ just one over left, ah were roused from me slumber and sent out for a wanton thrape. It were like Riz'd unleashed hell. Let me talk you through it.

BOOM – I turn my first ball to deep square leg for a single. BOOM SHAKE THE ROOM – I turn my second, and final, ball to deep square leg for a single. T’lads were goin’ crackers on t’boundary. They'd never seen fireworks like it. It were like bonfire night: two balls, two singles, 100% strike rate, and not out. Eat my shorts Afridi – tiger stripes an’ all!

Anyway, as my old mum used to shout at around 4pm some 30-odd years ago, “Teatime!”

Wi’ summat lads still fastin’, we had a load o’ grub for tea and Phil Ridout muster been laking elsewhere, ‘cos it’s not like ‘im to miss out on a bit o’ free snap. So’s ah’ve wolfed down a palett’s worth o’party food and it’s time ter field. Having batted at nine I honestly expected a bowl and I’d arranged with Fred Done Bookmakers to bowl no-balls to order. Shame it never ‘appened. Ah could've done wi' that thrupence ha'penny he promised me.

We oppened up wi’ t’young spinner Yasir (12-2-42-1) a keen youth who, when not bowling, jigged abaht in t’field like a morris dancer wi’ crabs. He tied an end down nicely though, whilst young Waleed (7-2-11-2) steamed down t’hill like pipin' 'ot treacle pudding, smothering their batsmen in his outswinging custard.

The old Luckster, Riz and W. G Durrani all chipped in wi’ braces too but Hulk Foot Ridout were a trifle unlucky that his custard weren’t as ‘ot as Waleed’s and ‘e finished wicketless. BUT, he does have a girlfriend, a fact that he used at regular intervals throughout the game to keep Robbie quiet.

Must just mention this: T’gaffer took t’catch ot season. Ah’ll talk thee through it: Huge heft, thick edge, big hand, surprised look, little juggle, miracle catch at second slip from our Riz. Fabluss.

We won by 44 runs in t'end and finished t'season on a high – unbeaten in five games. But it were a disappointment on t'ole. Ne’er mind, there’s allus next year.

Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club 2nd XI Batting
191 for 8
Player Name RunsCatchesStumpingsRun outs
Rob McDougall Bowled  43 3
Oliver Ridout Bowled  6
Sarfraz Ahmed Lbw  5
Shakeel Durrani Caught  62 1
Haris Ali Soomro Caught  18
Rizwan Siddiqui Bowled  20 1
Hassan Ali Caught  21
Waleed Khan Caught  8 1
Matt Crutchlow Not Out  2
Roger Luck Not Out  2
Yasir Khan  

Northwood Town Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
No records to display.

Northwood Town Batting
147 for 10
Player name Runs
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   

Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club 2nd XI Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
Yasir Khan12.0242142.003.50
Waleed Khan7.021125.501.57
Roger Luck5.0027213.505.40
Oliver Ridout4.001800.004.50
Rizwan Siddiqui7.3122211.002.93
Shakeel Durrani4.011025.002.50

  • Umpire :
    Dani
  • Scorer :
    Ansab