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Southgate Adelaide v Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club 2nd XI on Sat 10 Jul 2010 at 1:00pm
Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club Won by 155 runs
Match report
Adelaide feels the heat as 2s catch a fire...
Hell’s teeth and gums, it was hot on Saturday. Hotter than Beyonce and The Saturdays doing a nude wrestle in a paddling pool full of Scotch bonnets.
The usual suspects arrived at Southgate Adelaide’s ground pointlessly early – which is to say, on time – and with skipper Rizwan ‘The Rizla’ Siddiqui stuck in traffic, the toss was won by his able Deputy, Sarfraz Ahmed.
Saffy decided we should bat. Which was a good idea because we only had eight players at that point.
Matt Crutchlow (22) and Will Hughes (59) opened up on a deck that promised more pace and bounce than it delivered and, whilst Hughes was prepared to studiously play himself in, Crutchlow went off like a train (albeit the Puffing Billy), hitting five boundaries in his brief innings. I know what you’re thinking, but the bowling wasn’t bad at all.
Southgate’s opening slingers were a mixture of hirsute youth and grizzled experience: from the scoreboard end, a leathery old Australian kept it ‘there or thereabouts’ whilst at the pavilion end, in steamed a young ‘un with long, curly hair who had recently been selected to play for Middlesex U17s. He was a real dead-ringer for love, I mean Ryan Sidebottom, and bowled a bit too short at Crutchlow, who, on such a glorious afternoon, was only too willing to open up the hamper and hand out a few slices of his bread and butter shot – a rustic smear through the covers.
When Crutchlow was cleaned out by a ball that nipped back off the seam, Douglas ‘Pinky’ Pyrke (4) entered the sizzling arena. Being a nice polite boy, Pinky didn’t overstay his welcome. He swiftly departed, LBW, to make way for elder statesman, Haris Ali Soomro (84 – that’s runs, not years old).
There was top value for shots on this hot summer’s day. Oh yes indeed. The outfield was hard and fast and the Hughes/Soomro pairing enjoyed a fruitful partnership of around 100 runs. At this point, we were well in control of the match – something we are never really comfortable with. So, to rectify the situation, we staged a mini collapse.
Will Hughes was next out, following an unattractive and inaccurate heave at their spinner, who took a decent Michelle. Then, in swaggered Greg Crudest, sporting his trademark determined gurn, and wearing two shirts in an attempt to contain his rampant physicality. Three balls later, The Crudest swaggered back for a well-earned B&H after missing a straight full toss and being correctly adjudged LBW for 0.
140-4 and the game was back in the balance. Just the way we like it.
When Hasan Ali (12) also missed a straight full toss and was out LBW, the late-doors onslaught that The Rizla had been confidently preparing had to be hastily converted into a bat-out-the-overs-rear-guard-manoeuvre-type-thing. But not before Joe ‘The Trashcan’ Askham biffed a rapid 19, including two sixes. However, when Trashcan was stumped, and then Saffy and a fatigued Soomro were bowled in quick succession, it was left to Arun ‘The Gent’ Madhasaravanan and The Rizla to circumspectly see out the remainder of our 53 overs.
At first sight, 234 looked below par, but having batted on the pitch, we were confident we could do the job and bring home our second win in successive weeks.
Tea was taken in an air-conditioned room which nobody wanted to leave, but back out onto the baking battlefield we had to traipse. And we struck almost immediately.
Ollie ‘Hulk Foot’ Ridout took the edge of one nervy opener with a jaffa and Soomro did the rest at slip. Wickets continued to fall regularly and, to be honest, Southgate Adelaide were never in the match. Still, nobody wanted to hang about for 47 overs playing out a bore draw, so the wickets still needed to be taken.
Keen to make a contribution to the game, The Crudest applied some verbal pressure to their number three: “I can hear his stomach from here,” Greg quipped immediately prior to the ‘nervous’ batsman hitting The Rizla through the covers harder than The Rizla had ever been hit through the covers before. But this momentary lapse into overpitching served only to further stoke the fire in The Rizla’s formidable belly, and he shouldered through a faster ball to trap the batsman LBW. The Crudest wished him all the very best upon his departure.
That we managed to take all of Southgate Adelaide’s wickets is testimony to the fine bowling and good fielding on display (remember Kings Langley away anyone?) There was just the one catch dropped all game (surely a 2s record?) which also included a fine run-out from the recently-departed Arun M.
The Rizla (10-4-24-3), Ollie Ridout (9-0-23-3), Arun Madhasaravanan (2.3-0-10-2) and Sarfraz Ahmed (3-1-12-1) did a fine job with the ball and catches were shared throughout.
So, a good all-round team performance with no comic moments. None whatsoever. Especially not a pitiful attempted run-out by a senior player that resulted in Joe Askham shouting, “Hey, Anonymous Senior Player, does your husband play cricket too?” Nobody laughed, Joe. Nobody laughed because it never happened.
Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club 2nd XI Batting
234 for 8
Player Name
Runs
Catches
Stumpings
Run outs
Will Hughes
Bowled
59
Matt Crutchlow
Bowled
22
1
Doug Pyrke
Lbw
4
1
Haris Ali Soomro
Bowled
84
1
Gregg Cruder
Lbw
0
Hassan Ali
Lbw
12
1
Joseph Askham
Stumped
19
1
Sarfraz Ahmed
Bowled
6
Rizwan Siddiqui
Not Out
8
Arun Madhasaravanan
Not Out
12
1
Oliver Ridout
Southgate Adelaide Bowling
Player name
Overs
Maidens
Runs
Wickets
Average
Economy
No records to display.
Southgate Adelaide Batting
71 for 10
Player name
Runs
Lyte
Caught Ridout
4
Chandler
Lbw Siddiqui
7
Fitzpatrick
Lbw Siddiqui
9
Elwood
Caught Siddiqui
17
Farrell
Caught Ridout
0
Fitzpatrick
Bowled Arun
23
Kenna
Caught Ridout
0
Watts
Run out (Arun)
1
Collard
Caught Arun
2
Morris
Caught Sarfraz
1
Cohen
Not Out
0
Totteridge Millhillians Cricket Club 2nd XI Bowling
Player Name
Overs
Maidens
Runs
Wickets
Average
Economy
Rizwan Siddiqui
10.0
4
24
3
8.00
2.40
Oliver Ridout
9.0
0
23
3
7.67
2.56
Sarfraz Ahmed
3.0
1
12
1
12.00
4.00
Arun Madhasaravanan
2.3
0
10
2
5.00
4.00
Umpire :
ali kazmi
Scorer :
team
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